How to gain the confidence to show up

Hi there Mompreneurs! How are you all doing today?

This week we are talking all about how you can gain the confidence to show up in your business. Now, confident people are usually able to face situations without even blinking. But for the rest of us, we usually melt away or run away when faced with a challenging situation and this all starts with our level of self-esteem.

I remember facing this kind of low level of self-esteem for a very long time. It started in my early teens and I believe it steamed from the fact that I thought that I was just too skinny. I would be so embarrassed about my protruding knees or my hip bones, my skinny legs and that really stopped me from interacting with new people, and it really caused me to stay indoors a lot. Now, when I started business, I knew that I had to improve in this area, especially since I wanted to get clients. In the coaching business and in any business for a matter of fact, confidence is key. Low self-esteem stopped me from showing up as I would of liked online and for my client as well. So I knew I had to work in this area. And here are some of the things that I did to help me and I know they would help you as well.

But before I do that, let me give you a real life story of how a lack of confidence almost caused me to miss out on some very key relationships. I had the opportunity to go to Milan, Italy for a Mastermind, and there I met some high-level women entrepreneurs. All who were beaming with confidence. They asked questions. They gave their stories and I was so shy that I decided to take the seat that was furthest away from the host. She recognized this and immediately she pulled me towards her at the head of the table.

So you see, your lack of confidence can be seen so easily by those who you need to interact with. I had to realize that I deserved to be there and that I earned my right to be at the table with those high-level women entrepreneurs. I made the sacrifices. I ensured I got to Milan. I paid for my hotel and my travel, and I also got time to spend in Paris. That time for myself that was so needed. And I had to realize that my confidence had to increase if I wanted to increase in my business as well. So it took some time but I am so glad that I took the opportunity and that I took the time to work on myself in this area. So let me give you 3 points that would help you increase your confidence today.

Number 1: Competence is confidence. There are some organizations like Toastmasters that helps those who are afraid to speak in public. They help you to toughen up and they give you the tools to be more confident when speaking to the public. There are also lots of other speaking courses, low cost courses that you can take that will increase your competence in showing up. One thing that really helped me in this area was going live on Facebook. I hated to go live on Facebook because I felt I wasn’t competent enough to speak on my area of expertise. But because I increased my confidence in this area by continuing to do it again and again, I’m way better now at showing up in public then I used to be 3, 4 years ago and that’s because I just started and this really works. And that leads me to my next point.

One secret to confidence and self-esteem is to be able to trust what you are able to do. This comes with a lot of practice and a lot of study. That’s why you should plan what you are going to say before you decide to show up. Take a few minutes to plan. Okay what is your topic? What are you going to say in your intro? What are the main points you want to talk to your audience about? What call-to-action do you want them to take at the end of your talk?  Trust what you are good at and show up like you know what you are talking about. Because only you are able to say what you have to say in your own unique way.

The third point is to believe in yourself. One of the reasons why people are not confident in themselves, is the fact that they are already convinced that they’re doomed even before they start and they feel like they have failed even before they have started. Never underestimate the power of the mind. If you believe you will fail, then you indeed will. A better exercise would be to believe that you can succeed. Set your mind toward succeeding and you probably will. If that means to doing a month of mind work then do it! I know it surely helped me. 

So, those are my 3 points for you today. Remember, competence is confidence, trust what you are able to do and believe in yourself like I believe in you. I know you can do this. You were meant for greatness. Don’t stop now. Continue. Increase your confidence. Join a group that helps you in this area or hire a coach that specializes in this area. But above all of these, the one thing that really helped me was believing in myself. So let me know in the comments which one of these tips are you going to utilize today.

So that’s it for this week. Have an amazing week and we shall see again in my next show.

Bye!